Gender-Based Violence Begins Before Physical Harm: Why Men and Boys Must Take Action
Gender-based violence remains a serious social challenge affecting the safety, dignity, freedom, and well-being of millions of people around the world. Although physical assault is one of its most visible forms, harmful behaviour can begin much earlier through intimidation, controlling actions, degrading language, harassment, discrimination, and the normalisation of unequal power relationships.

Preventing violence therefore requires more than responding after someone has been harmed. It demands early intervention, changes in social attitudes, accountability for harmful conduct, and a collective commitment to respecting the rights and choices of others.
Men and boys have an important role in this effort. By challenging harmful attitudes, speaking out against harassment, and supporting women’s right to live without fear, they can help create safer homes, workplaces, educational institutions, and public spaces.
The message behind campaigns such as HeForShe and the broader movement to end gender-based violence is straightforward: preventing violence is a shared responsibility, and silence should never become an excuse for allowing harmful behaviour to continue.
Understanding How Gender-Based Violence Develops
Gender-based violence refers to harmful acts directed at a person because of their gender or acts that disproportionately affect people of a particular gender. Women and girls experience many forms of such violence, although people of all genders can be affected.
Physical assault is only one part of the problem. Gender-based violence can also include sexual abuse, psychological abuse, economic control, stalking, sexual harassment, coercion, and threats.
In some situations, harmful behaviour develops gradually. A person may begin by making humiliating remarks, monitoring a partner’s movements, restricting friendships, or repeatedly ignoring clearly expressed boundaries.
These actions should not automatically be treated as harmless simply because they do not involve physical injury.
Repeated controlling behaviour, intimidation, and threats can undermine a person’s independence and sense of security. When such conduct is excused or normalised, it may become more difficult for the affected person to seek help or challenge the behaviour.
However, violence does not follow one universal pattern, and not every harmful act necessarily develops into physical assault. The important point is that harmful behaviour deserves attention in its own right.
Recognising warning signs early can help individuals and communities respond before situations become more dangerous.
Harmful Social Attitudes Can Create Conditions for Abuse
Social attitudes influence how people understand relationships, power, consent, and acceptable behaviour.
When humiliation is dismissed as humour, controlling behaviour is portrayed as a sign of affection, or harassment is blamed on the person experiencing it, harmful conduct can become normalised.
Certain stereotypes can also contribute to unequal expectations. For example, beliefs that men must always exercise authority or that women should tolerate unwanted behaviour can undermine respect and personal autonomy.
Such attitudes do not inevitably lead to violence, but they can create an environment in which abuse is minimised and accountability becomes more difficult.
Changing these attitudes requires sustained effort from families, schools, workplaces, community leaders, media organisations, and public institutions.
Children and young people should learn from an early age that respect does not mean control, affection does not justify possessiveness, and disagreement never gives someone the right to threaten or intimidate another person.
Healthy relationships are built on mutual respect, trust, communication, and freely given consent.
Why Men and Boys Must Be Part of the Solution
Ending gender-based violence cannot be achieved by placing the entire burden on women and girls to protect themselves.
Men and boys can contribute by examining their own behaviour, challenging harmful beliefs, and taking responsibility for creating respectful environments.
Their participation is important because gender expectations are often reinforced through peer groups, family relationships, workplaces, educational settings, and wider social networks.
1. Challenge Sexist Remarks and Humiliating Jokes
Disrespectful comments about women are sometimes dismissed as ordinary conversation or harmless humour.
When such remarks demean people because of their gender, they can reinforce stereotypes and make discrimination appear acceptable.
Men and boys can respond by calmly making it clear that degrading language is inappropriate.
They do not need to turn every disagreement into a confrontation. A brief response, a respectful challenge, or support for the person being targeted can help establish healthier social expectations.
The objective is to make respect a normal part of everyday interaction.
2. Respect Consent and Personal Boundaries
Consent is essential to healthy personal and intimate relationships.
Everyone has the right to decide what happens to their body and to communicate personal boundaries without fear of punishment, intimidation, or pressure.
Silence, fear, previous consent, or an existing relationship should not be interpreted as automatic permission.
Men and boys can help establish respectful relationships by listening carefully, accepting refusals, and recognising that consent must be freely given.
Respecting boundaries is not a favour. It is a fundamental requirement of safe and dignified relationships.
3. Reject Controlling Behaviour
Repeatedly checking a partner’s phone without permission, demanding constant updates, restricting friendships, or using threats to influence personal decisions can be warning signs of controlling behaviour.
Such actions should not be romanticised as proof of love or commitment.
Healthy relationships allow both people to maintain their independence, develop friendships, and make decisions without coercion.
Men and boys can help challenge the idea that a partner’s behaviour must be controlled to demonstrate loyalty.
Trust and mutual understanding provide a stronger foundation for relationships than surveillance, fear, or possessiveness.
4. Speak Up When Witnessing Harassment
Bystanders can play an important role in preventing harm.
If someone witnesses harassment, intimidation, or degrading treatment, ignoring the incident may leave the targeted person feeling isolated.
Where it is safe to do so, a bystander can interrupt the behaviour, express disapproval, support the affected person, or seek assistance from an appropriate authority.
Direct confrontation is not always the safest option. In some situations, distracting the aggressor, asking another person for help, documenting an incident safely, or checking on the affected person afterwards may be more appropriate.
The response should prioritise safety rather than escalating the situation.
Speaking up does not require extraordinary courage in every instance. Often, it begins with a practical decision not to treat harmful behaviour as acceptable.
The Importance of Consent Education and Respectful Relationships
Education is an essential part of long-term violence prevention.
Schools, colleges, and community organisations can help young people understand consent, emotional regulation, equality, conflict resolution, and healthy relationships.
Age-appropriate education can also address harmful stereotypes and explain why threats, humiliation, coercion, and unwanted sexual behaviour are unacceptable.
Young people benefit from seeing respectful behaviour modelled by adults. Parents, teachers, coaches, and community leaders can reinforce these lessons through their everyday actions.
Education should also encourage boys to express emotions in healthy ways rather than treating aggression or domination as proof of strength.
At the same time, programmes must be carefully designed, inclusive, and supported by evidence. Awareness alone is not sufficient when people face structural barriers to safety, reporting, and access to justice.
Effective prevention combines education with accountability, accessible support services, and institutions capable of responding appropriately to abuse.
Creating Safer Workplaces and Educational Institutions
Workplaces and educational institutions have a responsibility to establish environments where harassment and discrimination are taken seriously.
Clear policies can explain what constitutes unacceptable behaviour, how complaints can be reported, and what protections are available to people who raise concerns.
Institutions should provide confidential reporting channels where appropriate, investigate complaints fairly, and take proportionate action when misconduct is established.
Managers, teachers, and other people in positions of authority need suitable training to recognise harmful conduct and respond without blaming the person affected.
Organisations should also consider how power imbalances can discourage reporting. Employees, students, or trainees may fear retaliation, reputational damage, or negative consequences for their future opportunities.
Protecting people who report misconduct and ensuring fair procedures can help build confidence in institutional responses.
A respectful environment is not created simply by publishing a policy. It requires consistent implementation and accountability at every level.
Supporting Survivors With Dignity and Compassion
People who experience gender-based violence may face physical injuries, emotional distress, financial difficulties, social isolation, or disruption to their education and employment.
Some may hesitate to disclose what happened because they fear being disbelieved, blamed, or judged.
A supportive response begins with listening and respecting the person’s choices.
Friends, relatives, colleagues, and community members should avoid questioning why someone did not resist, leave, or report the incident immediately. Such questions can unfairly shift responsibility away from the person who caused the harm.
Instead, supporters can ask what assistance is needed, help identify appropriate services, and respect the affected person’s privacy.
Depending on the circumstances, support may include medical care, counselling, legal assistance, safe accommodation, or help contacting relevant authorities.
Not every person wants the same response, and assistance should be tailored to individual circumstances.
Where there is immediate danger, obtaining emergency help and prioritising safety are essential.
Survivors should not be expected to carry the responsibility for preventing future violence. That responsibility also belongs to those who cause harm and to institutions responsible for addressing it.
The Role of Families and Communities
Families and communities can influence the attitudes that children and young people develop about gender, power, and relationships.
Respectful behaviour should be encouraged for everyone, regardless of gender.
Children can learn that household responsibilities should be shared fairly, personal boundaries matter, and disagreements should be handled without intimidation or humiliation.
Community organisations can organise discussions, awareness campaigns, and educational programmes that encourage people to question harmful stereotypes.
Religious, cultural, educational, and community leaders can also help communicate that dignity and safety are shared human values.
However, traditions or social expectations should not be used to excuse abuse or deny people their rights.
Communities are most effective when they combine public awareness with practical support for affected individuals and clear expectations of accountability.
Digital Abuse Is Also a Serious Concern
The growth of digital communication has created additional ways in which harassment and coercive behaviour can occur.
Online abuse may include threatening messages, repeated unwanted contact, non-consensual sharing of intimate images, impersonation, targeted humiliation, or attempts to monitor another person’s online activity.
Digital platforms can amplify harmful conduct because content may be shared rapidly and reach large audiences.
Men and boys can contribute to safer online spaces by refusing to participate in harassment, not sharing intimate material without consent, challenging degrading content, and reporting serious abuse through appropriate channels.
Individuals should also respect digital boundaries in personal relationships. Access to someone’s device, account, or private messages should not be assumed simply because two people are close.
Technology companies, educational institutions, and public authorities also have responsibilities to address abuse through appropriate safety measures, reporting systems, and enforcement of applicable laws.
Online behaviour should be guided by the same principles of dignity and respect that apply offline.
From Awareness to Action: Building a Culture of Accountability
Public campaigns can draw attention to gender-based violence, but lasting change requires action beyond a single event or social media message.
Governments, institutions, employers, and communities can strengthen prevention through several practical measures:
- Invest in prevention education: Teach consent, equality, respectful communication, and healthy relationship skills.
- Challenge harmful stereotypes: Address attitudes that excuse harassment, coercion, or unequal treatment.
- Strengthen reporting systems: Provide accessible and appropriate ways to report abuse and seek assistance.
- Support survivors: Improve access to medical, psychological, legal, and social services.
- Promote responsible leadership: Ensure that people in positions of authority model respectful behaviour and respond appropriately to misconduct.
- Improve accountability: Apply fair procedures and appropriate consequences when wrongdoing is established.
- Measure progress: Evaluate whether prevention programmes improve knowledge, reporting access, institutional responses, and safety outcomes.
These efforts should involve women and girls in shaping policies and programmes that affect their lives.
They should also recognise that gender-based violence can intersect with other forms of disadvantage, including disability, economic insecurity, social exclusion, and limited access to services.
A coordinated approach is necessary because no single intervention can address every cause or form of violence.
HeForShe: Encouraging Men to Become Active Allies
The HeForShe movement promotes the participation of men and boys in efforts to advance gender equality.
Its broader message is that equality should not be treated as an issue affecting only women. Men can help challenge harmful social expectations and support environments in which everyone can live with dignity and security.
Being an ally involves more than expressing agreement with a campaign.
It means examining personal attitudes, accepting responsibility for one’s behaviour, respecting women’s choices, challenging discrimination, and supporting fair treatment in everyday situations.
It also means listening to women and girls rather than assuming that one person can speak for everyone who experiences gender-based violence.
Constructive participation requires consistency. Respect should not depend on whether an incident attracts public attention or whether someone is watching.
When men and boys make respectful conduct part of their daily behaviour, they can help establish social expectations that discourage harassment and make accountability more likely.
Conclusion: Prevention Begins With Everyday Choices
Gender-based violence cannot be addressed effectively by focusing only on incidents that result in visible physical injuries.
Humiliation, harassment, coercion, intimidation, and controlling behaviour also deserve serious attention. When these actions are dismissed or normalised, the people affected may find it harder to seek support and challenge the conduct.
Preventing violence requires education, supportive communities, responsible institutions, effective laws, and accessible services for those affected.
Men and boys have a meaningful role in this effort. They can challenge sexist attitudes, respect consent, reject controlling behaviour, intervene safely when witnessing harassment, and encourage their peers to treat women with dignity.
Women and girls should not have to carry the entire burden of preventing violence or protecting themselves from abuse.
A safer society begins when respect becomes a daily practice, harmful behaviour is challenged rather than excused, and everyone takes responsibility for creating environments where women and girls can live without fear.